How to fight racism & How not to

How not to fight racism:

How to fight racism:

  • Challenge any and all racial stereotypes.
  • Acknowledge and fight the racism you have internalized.
  • Acknowledge and fight external racism.
  • Address someone when expressing something racist, in a nonviolent and logical way.
  • Address it when members of your own race are fighting racism in the wrong way.
  • Do not use the term “reverse racism.”
  • Don’t be biased, be consistent when addressing racial issues.
  • Do not overlook problematic beliefs just because the person expressing them is agreeing with you.
  • Don’t enforce stereotypes.

Things to remember:

  • Racism isn’t specific to any certain group.
  • That reverse racism isn’t a thing because the definition of racism is not race-specific, not because you think a white person can’t experience racism.
  • The definition of racism.
  • Calling someone names or using bad language won’t make a difference.
  • Making blogs dedicated to shaming white people won’t help, either.
  • Making fun of “white” culture won’t help.
  • No one’s feelings should be devalued because of their race alone.
  • That racist ideas and stereotypes are literally shoved down our throats at a young age and that many people don’t even know they’re racist or posses racist beliefs.
  • That adding more racism will not solve anything.

How to fight sexism & How not to

How not to fight sexism:

How to fight sexism:

  • Challenge any and all sexist stereotypes.
  • Acknowledge and fight the sexism you have internalized.
  • Acknowledge and fight external sexism.
  • Address someone when expressing something sexist, in a nonviolent and logical way.
  • Address it when members of your own sex are fighting sexism in the wrong way.
  • Do not use the term “reverse sexism.”
  • Don’t be biased, be consistent when addressing sexist issues.
  • Do not overlook problematic beliefs just because the person expressing them is agreeing with you.
  • Don’t enforce stereotypes.

Things to remember:

  • Sexism isn’t specific to any sex in particular.
  • That reverse sexism isn’t a thing because the definition of sexism is not necessarily sex-specific, not because you think a man can’t experience sexism.
  • The definition of sexism.
  • Calling someone names or using bad language won’t make a difference.
  • Making blogs dedicated to shaming men won’t help, either.
  • Making fun of men’s sensitivities won’t help.
  • No one’s feelings should be devalued because of their sex alone.
  • That sexist ideas and stereotypes are literally shoved down our throats at a young age and that many people don’t even know they’re sexist or posses sexist beliefs.
  • That adding more sexism will not solve anything.

What to bringt to a Portfolio Photoshoot

(This applies only to portfolio shoot, a commercial shoot you might require more depending on the client and project)
The first thing in making a photo shoot work just right is preparing 3-4 days before the shoot.

PREPARATION

  1. Plan for 3-5 outfits if you are shooting for a basic modeling portfolio * Make sure you don’t do any wild designs; solid colors usually work the best. If you do decide to do certain design(s) make sure you talk it over with the photographer first.
  2. Every outfit should have accessories Some of these accessories include:
    A. Necklaces
    B. Earrings
    C. Scarf’s
    D. Flat & high shoes
    E. Belts
    F. Colored bras
    G. Different colored undies
    (the absence of accessories can make a photo look too bland)
  3. Plan a certain location; whether its in a studio or at an outdoor location
    (most of the time the photographer will plan this)
    make sure your outfits fit with the location or backgrounds
  4. Make sure you talk to the photographer a day before the shoot and confirm everything that you already talked about, this helps avoid misunderstandings and lack of communication.
  5. One of the most important things the night before is to get sleep; don’t go out drinking and partying it will make your eyes puffy and your mood cranky.

This is normally a day before the shoot

THINGS TO PACK FOR THE SHOOT

1. MAKEUP

A. Eye cream, eye gel for puffiness and body lotion
B. Eye Make-Up Remover
C. Eye Drops
D. Blush
E. Foundation
F. Mascara
G. Eye Shadows
H. Lip
I. Face Powder
J. Moisturizer
K. Cleanser
L. Tweezers
M. Mirror

2. HAIR

A. Brush
B. Hairspray
C. Hair Ties (thin)
D. Headband
E. Bobby pins
F. Hair Appliances (Curling Irons, straightners, etc)

DAY OF THE SHOOT

  1. Make sure you arrive about 15-20 min early so you can be fully prepared by the time the photo shoot starts.
  2. Bring your portfolio with you along with a couple photo clip outs of pictures you want in your portfolio
  3. You are now ready for your photo shoot

GOOD LUCK!

How to: Stretch your Ears

In depth stretching guide.

What you need: KY Jelly (or another skin safe water based lubricant), correct jewelry, bondage tape, BioOil (or another oil like jojoba, vitamin e or emu oil), a lot of patience and a lot of time.

Let’s start off. Your ears. They should have been pierced for a minimum of 6-9 months before you begin stretching. You should also know what gauge they were pierced at. For the purpose of this guide, I’ll assume they are pierced at 16g (1.2mm).

Starting out: Get some 1.6mm internally threaded jewelry. It can be a labret, barbell, septum keeper. Massage your ear whilst bathing/showering, and cover the jewelry, and the front of your lobe with the lube. Slowly, push the jewelry through. If you meet any resistance, stop, wait a week (whilst massaging daily) and try again. Congratulations, you’ve made your first foray into the world of stretching!

Now, you want to wait a month,  and get some 2mm/12g jewelry. Make sure, it has to be internally threaded/not threaded. Repeat the process again, remember. Any pain, stop, and wait a week whilst massaging your lobes daily. Continue through 2.4mm/10g to 3mm/8g.

Now, we’re up at 3.2mm/8g. It should have taken you three months to get here. Now we want to start taping. You want to get some surgical steel/titanium plugs (or tunnels, your choice!). Lube your ears up, and pop them in. I say pop, but, make sure you do it slowly and carefully. As this is the first stretch up into ‘larger’ territory, you can use a taper. Now, the number one rule of stretching, tapers aren’t jewelry! Get the taper, and hold the larger end against the end of the plug. Make sure they line up. Lube them both up, as well as the piercing, and in one swift motion, push the taper through. As you have the plug lined up on the end of the taper, it’ll slide through into place. Try not to use acrylic tapers, as they have a very bad size gradient and often lead to tearing of the piercing fistula. So.  Now you have a nice 3.2mm stretch.

How do I start taping?! I hear you cry. Well. Here we go. Wait a week. Make sure the stretch is happy, healthy, and not sore in anyway. Carefully cut a strip of the bondage tape, and wrap one layer around the plug. You want to make sure it doesn’t overlap, as you just want one layer on the begin with. Cover the tape and plug in your chosen oil, and put it back in. Now, wait for another week, and do another tape wrap. And then one last time in another week. So, you’ve done three tape wraps in three weeks. Every other day, you want to remove the plug and cover it in oil again to make sure the tape doesn’t dry your lobes out.

Now, because you need to include every mm increment, you may find the most cost effective way of doing this, is using acrylic. As you should be aware, acrylic is terrible for stretched piercings. So, there’s a way around this. Instead of waiting a month before reaching the next g/mm, wait 5 weeks, and do one more tape wrap. This means, when you reach the next mm (ie 3mm to 4mm) you end up with a fraction over 4mm. This means, you can pop a new tape wrap over the new plug, preventing the acrylic from ever touching your ears.

Now, you’ll want to repeat this all the way up (and I mean ALL THE WAY) up to your goal size. Never skip, never keep going if it hurts, and never use acrylic. Always lube and oil!

So, here it is in a nutshell (from 3mm)

  1. Insert the plug safely, using a taper. Wait a week.

  2. First tape wrap. Oil oil oil!

  3. Wait a week. Second tape wrap. What’s the magic word? OIL!

  4. Wait a week, third wrap. Oil.

  5. Wait a week, fourth and final tape wrap. Oil.

  6. Get the next plug size up (4mm in this case) and do one tape wrap.

  7. Then, insert the plug. Any resistance, stop, wait a week.

So, there we go! The seven step next size tape wrap method!

Via Google...

Saying “No” to Others

It can be hard to say “no” and to do your own thing. We expect disapproval or rejection by our friends. So how do you say “no” in a respectful way when you can’t, or you don’t want to, say “yes” to them?

1. Listen with respect to what the person has to say. Don’t interrupt when they’re talking, act flustered or annoyed. It’s fine for them to ask – at this stage, it’s just a question.

2. Simply say “no” in a calm and an even voice. Don’t sound like you’re upset, or start to whine or raise your voice. Just say “no” in a calm and a confident way. Also, you’ll respect yourself more if you speak up for yourself.

3. Transfer the reason and the blame to something else. For example, say something like “I’m really sorry but my calendar is full”. This focuses annoyance on your calendar – not you. (But don’t be tempted to lie or to come up with excuses as you may be found out later – and you’ll really feel bad then!)

4. Don’t react or be confrontational. They can ask what they want, and have the right to make requests – and you have the right to accept or decline. Say: “I’d love to say yes, but ..(and then turn them down)” as this helps build a bridge, and conveys empathy.

5. Don’t feel you have to give an explanation when you answer. You don’t have to give a reason or explain yourself to others. Say: “I’m sorry, I can’t make it” – then politely change the subject.

6. If you want to give a reason then keep it short and simple. Don’t justify yourself or start to argue your case. True friends accept your answer and respect your boundaries.

7. Stand firm in your decision. If the person starts to pressure you, just tell them you’ve decided, and nothing they can say is going to make you change your mind.

Cat No Follow Me SanderB | via Facebook

Happiness

FOR LAUGHS / what?

BODY ACCEPTANCE + TIPS! Head To Toe!

Let’s start in order from head to toe 🙂

Head/Face/Hair:

  • Having curly/straight/wavy/no hair is perfectly fine
  • If you suspect you have lice get it treated ASAP!! it’s not an indicator of how dirty you are, ANYONE can get lice! drugstores generally sell cheap products to treat it.
  • dry hair? coconut oil. oily hair? use a clarIfying shampoo once a month.
  • your hair is flawless. or lack of hair. you go.
  • eyebrows: big eyebrows r in so dont feel self conscious about your furry brows!! If you REALLY feel bad, i recommend threading, plucking, or waxing but for the love of god DO NOT GO CRAZY OR SHAVE!!
  • don’t have eyebrows on fleek?behold.
  • hair on your face?? normal!! don’t like it?? use a tiny electric trimmer!! you can find them for under $20 and they’re so worth it! it’s painless, it’s small, it’s cute n easy to use.
  • If you have acne, alert your guardian so you can see a dermatologist. If not, buy tea tree oil, and then make a mix of 1 part tea tree oil, 10 parts water, n dab it on the acne. also: dO NOT PICK AT your ACNE W your FINGERS!! use a tissue, wash your hands, be gentle, bc If not you will leave scars.

Chest:

  • All breast sizes are beautIful! there is no such thing as “normal” bc no two pair of breasts are alike!!
  • If your really insecure about your size, i recommend looking at the dangers in the procedures of reductions/implants. it’s some serious stuff guys, and unless it’s damaging your health I’d stay the way you are.
  • Nipples can be inverted, darker, lighter, protruding, larger, and smaller than what you’ve seen in movies and such! Again, no such thing as normal!!
  • If you suffer from cracked nipples I recommend switching to cotton bras and using formulas made for people who r currently breastfeeding.
  • Nimple bumps are totally normal! So is hair!
  • Regularly feel your breasts for any abnormal lumps or bumps. If you detect anything out of the ordinary, don’t be hindered by embarrassment!! see a doctor ASAP!!

Stomach/Back:

  • All stomachs are awesome bellies r so cute I love them
  • Hair on your stomach and back is inevitable and not worth shaving don’t even stress.
  • If your stomach feels queasy: take Pepto Bismol! If you can’t, drink ginger ale or sprite, take deep breaths, eat saltines
  • If you have bad period cramps, take a Mydol or Aleve, use a warm compress, take a bath, take a nap, STAY HYDRATED!!!

Crotch/Genital Region/Legs:

  • Whatever you do with your pubic hair is entirely your choice. A good partner will not shame you for your preference.
  • That being said, you can:
  • Go all natural
  • Trim it a bit
  • Shave/Wax it
  • If you wax it, please visit a reputable place, the extra $$$ is worth it to ensure that you aren’t left with an infection or allergic reaction
  • Shaving tips: Use a (fairly) new razor, use coconut oil/baby oil/neosporin instead of shaving cream, use a mirror, and take your time. Rinse well afterwards.
  • There are products that prevent and treat razor bumps, use them to your advantage!
  • Never use a douche!! All lady parts smell, but If urs is bad or “fishy,” see a doctor, do not use scented products!!
  • ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS use protection! If you can’t wrap it then don’t tap it!
  • Some girls have larger labias, some girls don’t. All vaginas look dIfferent, there’s nothing wrong with yours! Anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar, a jerk, and has probably never seen a real vagina.
  • However, If you do sense that something is off, tell your doctor!!!!
  • As for legs, hair, scars, cellulite, its all treatable!

Moral of the story you’re all beautIful and I hope you enjoyed my body positivity/self care tips!

We are all wonderwomen 👸

10 Ways to improve Body Image

Back On Pointe | via Tumblr

Tips for Making Life Work

1. Focus on doing one thing at a time. Tackling multiple activities may seem more efficient, but giving one task your complete attention is actually more productive in the end. It also cuts down on your levels of stress.

2. Slow down and enjoy the journey. Whatever you’re doing is important right now. Don’t wish that it was over – and try and make it fun.

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3. Stop being such a perfectionist. If you’re a pilot or a surgeon then standards have their place … but for the rest of life “don’t be so hard on yourself”. Don’t stress out over details and impressing everyone.

4. Learn to delegate to others: take the pressure off yourself. Perhaps other people won’t do the job as well. But that’s how people grow – so why not give them that chance – and spend your own time doing things that you’d prefer to do.

5. Don’t always be waiting for the other shoe to drop. Lots of people spend their lives terrified of what might happen – and most of the time things work out to be just fine. Thus, they’re worrying for nothing when they could be having fun!

6. Focus on what you have, not what you wish you had. All of us have things we can be grateful for. Not everything is awful –and life’s not always bad. And if you change your focus to what you’re thankful for, you’ll find you feel much happier, and worry a lot less.

7. If things go wrong, just shrug your shoulders and smile. Remind yourself that life goes on – so don’t wreak your life wishing things were different or regretting what you’ve done. Also, things might work out next time. Tomorrow’s a new day.